We always hear about red flags, but what about green flags? In this episode we break down the good parts to expect from your relationship.
The Green Vs Red Flags
I saw an instagram post that highlighted what it looks like to see green flags within a relationship not too long ago. It took me a minute but I knew I wanted to touch on that topic. You can view the original post at the bottom of this post.
Seeing that made me so happy on the inside. We are too conditioned to see and discuss what is unhealthy in a relationship. So I figured it would be important to have the whole conversation.
In this podcast and blog post I highlight what the green flags are. Not just that, but I have included the red flags that rear their head when the green flags are missing.
When you feel safe you are physically and emotionally free to be who you are. Red flags appear when you are afraid to be yourself.
When you’re not feeling secure you’re focused on vengeance.
A green flag is where your partner is supporting you and pushing you towards your goals. Red flag is when they are being unsupportive, asking you to change your goals, being jealous, being demeaning.
A good sermon to refer to is Rip up your list by Pastor Mike at Trasnformation Church. It’s a great sermon series.
When you are able to have healthy communications with one another, that is a good sign. The red flags show themselves when you are not communicating, demeaning, rude.
How you say something matters. Cognitive reframing takes a lot of mental work. But it helps you understand yourself and others much better.
Having friends that are the same gender as your partner should not be problematic. Your partner should be supportive of building healthy friendships and family relationships.
Red flags are when your partner is not trusting you or making you feel bad for not spending all your time with them.
There are many good reasons to have friends around. But always remember “Don’t be relationshipist: excommunicating single people once you’re in a relationship.”
It is a great sign when your physical boundaries are respected (sex, sexual preferences, personal space, possessions). However, if you’re demanded to do things you don’t want to that is a red flag.
Setting boundaries will help you and them understand what you like and dislike physically.
Listening and Comforting
We love when our partners are listeners and comforters. My communication podcast with Stu dives deeper into this as well.
Be an active listener. Having someone who knows how to comfort you without needing to tell them every time you need it is very relieving.
Other Green Flags
Other green flags, buying you things when they think of you, reach out when they think of you, positive speech about you when you’re not around, loving you out loud verbally, social media, etc.
Let me know
- What are some red flags you see in a relationship
- How about any green flags for your relationships?